crash test darling

today i'm listening to: rilo kiley - potions for foxes

dead animals? guess so?

AND: ra ra riot - can you tell

yum and a half.

When I look into your eyes

I tend to lose my thoughts

Don't forget your stare

Oh what was that you said

"i will not mind my manners. I will mind my mind" -jk

lately, life's been beating me up.

for serious - i've got battle wounds...

and this is NOT how you shake a parade

BUT -- what matters when all this goes down,

and down the proverbial drain,

is how we get out of it.

sometimes, it's these tests that motivate me more,

and show me what we're all about.

sometimes I need a speed-bump or two.

(or in london, a "hump" or two.)

--was that a wink? or is something in your eye?--

sometimes picking up the pieces

is so much better than trying to jam

those puzzle pieces together.

suddenly, i'm motivated

and back on top of the world.

time to do, not watch.

watching is so 2000-and-late

best part about it is - i have a plan.

and let me say, it's a really good plan.

it's an awesome plan.

a mother-effing, awesomely-good plan.

life is better when we want things.

and when we make them happen.

for ourselves.

which, by no means, does it mean it'll be easy

it's going to be a challenge,

it's going to be hard,

and it's probably going to kill me.

but i'm going to beat everyone to the punch.

and while i'm at it.. i'll spike the punch.

[[that's the anthem. now throw your damn hands up.]]

i am not young enough

to know everything - oscar wilde

when it doesn't work out...

i'll fall 7 times. and stand up 8 times.

"How wonderful it is

that nobody need wait a single moment

before starting to improve the world" - anne frank

and the suspense is terrible

but i hope it lasts...

confidence is much sexier

determination is the new black

and a little leopard print never hurt anyone

on a school bus

?

because i'll give the world something new to "oooo" and "ahhhh" about

and in between? why not some "oo-la-las"

-don't let the man get you down. unless it's a boogie down... then GO AHEAD

AND GET DOWN

time to celebrate an ending. because it

precedes my new beginning.

"new knowledge is the most valuable commodity on earth. the more truth we have to work with, the richer we become" - kurt vonnegut

"part of me suspects that i'm a loser,

and the other part of me thinks i'm god almighty"

- john lennon

and until then - i'm eating a spoon-full of sugar, pursuing fabulousity, falling down laughing, and teaching mick jagger how to get some satisfaction.

xoxo. - jess

sun syllables

today i'm listening to: heart in a cage - chris thile

it's a cover of...

the strokes

mmm i don't hate them.

genius begets genius

coerce me into treason

where sense refuses to meet.

let my skinned knees lose reflex

unhook shins from two left feet.

bury me among quick-witted strangers

put a smile on my face.

when she's left to her own devices

she bathes in forgotten miracles and poor taste.

-jk

"Love is a gross exaggeration of the difference between one person and everybody else." - george bernard shaw

i got yelled at on the tube today.

one should understand, brits don't yell. and i was scared.

remember that being kind to people never goes out of style.

it feels like rain.

two days of sunshine and blue skies! in.a.row. i smell spring. maybe.. but -

i won't be wearing long johns any longer!

let's celebrate.

vancouver seems nice.

who's been painting my roses red

springtime and DANCING!

i'll take two --> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ttkwYI8H18k

if that doesn't put you in the mood for springtime, i don't know what will.

maybe drink some lemonade? or a milkshake?

i hate it when i'm making a milkshake, and the boys just show up in my yard.

maturity is a bitter disappointment

for which no remedy exists,

unless laughter can be said to remedy anything. - kurt vonnegut

life is a cavalcade of indelible experiences

let it wash over and over and over me.- jk

merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily,

life is but a dream

"a man is but the product of his thoughts. what he thinks, he becomes." -ghandi

xoxo. -jess

fly me to the moon

today i'm listening to: 40 day dream - edward sharpe & the magnetic zeros

that stage is magical.

oooooh i could die

sam's going to travel with me over spring break!

and making travel plans gives me the travel bug.

which is a disease i basically ail from constantly... but some days it hits me harder than others (like the 24 hour flu.)

it's basically killing me.

because sometimes a home base is a good thing.. after i travel, i'm more aware of that. but other times i'm just too curious. good thing i'm abroad already! -i'll walk out my door and quickly be swept to far-off places. (but right now i'm still waiting on an illusive, too important, life-changing phone call.)

anyway.....

the only problem about traveling is flying.

i'm not scared of it, no. i just hate the process.

...i get antsy.

then again, climbing into that bus in the sky and coming back out, hours later, in a completely

new place sometimes

blows my mind.

flying lesson:

they say you can learn so much

from what you fear so much.

this girl who loves far, far away

but hates to fly.

the beverage cart down the aisle

overhead compart-mental breakdown

and the deceit of the carpet

lying under her feet

(the windows and doors

lead to no ceilings or floors!)

the best kind of travel is the kind that takes you to someone/some place you love.

i wish the world was flat like the old days

then i could travel just by folding a map

no more airplanes, or speed trains, or freeways

there'd be no distance that could hold us back

-death cab for cutie

this travel/love talk got me thinking about the pros and cons of flying in relation to the pros and cons of falling in love.

how it's worth getting over the fear of the plane crash to get to see the world..

how it's hard to make yourself vunerable for the risk of getting hurt.

because, from personal experience,

flights and i have a give and take, love and hate relationship...

i'm afraid to fly, but love the travel
afraid to love, but the ground is so far now
and way up here and what if we crash?

expecting an end spent in free-fall disaster.

the crashlanding. the broken heart.
so when it gets shakey at forty thousand feet,
the turbulence. the phone doesn't ring.
remind yourself you can't cross the sea,
without getting up this high.

and look at all the places that airplanes can take you

and look at all the places that love can take you
you get to sit up in the clouds!

the risk and reward. the jet set.

our love took flight

between arrival gates and departure times.

and now up in the sky: all your baggage.
but waits heavy to be carried when you land.

remember that you miss 100% of the shots you don't take.

so kids... until then, i'm dreaming of boarding red-eyes, soaring over oceans,

and sitting up in the clouds

-xoxo. Jess